U can message me at my email. I will be ur auppoet. I just took a restraining order out on him yesterday and waiting for court on monday. Im sorry ur going thru this. We deserve better!!

I met a man a little over a year ago. A month into the relationship I found out that he was married and had two children. He was currently seperated because he had cheated on his wife for over 6mths before either the mistress or his wife found out. Stupidly I pushed the issue to the side and continued to date him. Before I knew it he was living with me. He seemed so charming and everything I wanted him to be. Soon he started controlling me in ways I have never felt. He constantly went through my phone and if he found message from another man he would take my phone and either destroy or sell it. Four phones later....I found out that he was sleeping with another woman and had an online dating profile. He was with her during the day while I was at work. I called him crying when she told me of their relationship via facebook. He calmly told me to look on top of the counter and read a letter he had written and to call him back after reading it. The letter was to his father in prison talking about his divorce from his wife, and his new "girlfriend" aka me. Saying that he was so miserable and unhappy with himself and that he found comfort in alcohol. I felt so sorry for him but knew that I couldnt help him. He had me mail the letter to his father... A few months later the same girl pops up and this time I changed the locks on the house and told him to never talk to me again. The same day I wwent home for lunch and as I opened the door to leave he busted threw the door, hit me in the face, pulled a knife on me and took my macbook computer and yet again another phone. Hysterically, I drove back to work and called him begging for my belongings (now i know this only made him happier). He told me that I would never see those things again until I learned how to act. I of course made a police report. I loved my computer and desperately wanted it back, I thought if I could fake our relationship that I could get it back. He held this computer over my head for 3 months before I decided to take it as a loss and move on. I told him that he couldnt buy my love he then said "but i can buy your time." we broke up at that point. within a weeks time he was living with another woman. there was constant drama. one night he showed up at my house with her car and was banging on my door at 3 am, knowing i have a child. i did not answer. i ignored him and he pretty much ignored me until he sent me a txt saying "happy thanksgiving" my response was "no contact until i get my computer." there was no contact. After their relationship soured (which i knew it would) he msgd me again saying that he loved me and wanted to be with me. he accepted me as a friend on facebook and there was more women on there than last time, they were women he had been with but used them as "fans." he made a status one time and no lie there was 380 comments from all of these "fans" and they were basically talking bad about me but he left me to defend myself. but behind the scenes he was messaging me telling me that he loved me because i could defend myself???!?!?! either way i told him that i wanted my computer and would come get it asap. i drove out to his mother's house to pick him up, and he came out with a bag (im thinking its the computer). He gets in the car and is his normal charming self. We drive half way down the street and he tells me that he doesnt have the computer anymore. He said that he would pay me back for it because he sold it!!!! OMG!!!I let him back in my life, after that day he was back at my house to stay. He gave me 400 dollars from his next check and told me he would give me more on his next check. Before we broke up we decided we wanted to go skiing in the winter time. Well it was winter and we planned a trip. We went skiing for the weekend and he paid for the entire thing. When we got home that was supposed to be payback for the rest of the computer. We are talking about a 1800 dollar computer! I let it slide being that he was all mine now and we were a "team." Life was good and I saw the divorce papers from his wife. Things were headed in the right direction until he decided to go through my phone once again. I had had no contact with any male since he returned to my life. I thought that if i tried my absolute best this time around that he would have nothing to get upset over. He found an old txt that I sent a male friend saying that I would cook him dinner, but this was when i was single!!! He made it out to be a huuuuge deal. So I got fed up and called this male friend and put him on speaker phone in front of my narc. I asked the friend to please tell my bf that there was never anything between us. Before i could get that out of my mouth he took the phone and had me pinned up against the wall choking me to the point i almost fainted. All in front of my son. He promised not to do it again... yea right!! He would always say things to me like "you cant love me, you dont even love yourself" For the past 6 mths that we have been together my self esteem has dropped drastically. His phone was always on lock and God forbid i would touch the damn thing. There was constant drama on his facebook but would just tell me that those girls envied me. BS! He manipulated every possible situation. I started to notice that I wasnt getting the "love" and "affection" that I was used to getting from someone that truly loved me. He would only tell me he loved me a certain times and I asked him why and he said "why say it, if you already know it?" !?!?!?! When discipling my 3 yr old child he would stoop to his level. I sold him my old car for dirt cheap. And he never really seemed to appreciate it. He took me to the beach for my bday but it just was convienient enough that his best friends was going to the beach the same weekend. Everything revolved around him. I invited him to go to a theme park with me and some of my friends and acted like a child when i was showing attention to them. I am 23 and he is 29 so he always felt like he was supposed to be in control. and for the most part i let him have that control. he always said that he didnt want anyone else because they were set in their ways and that he could train me. !?!?!?! i catered to this man, i made him breakfast every morning and i told him that he doesnt appreciate me and he said "every woman cooks, thats nothing special and if my woman didnt cook then i wouldnt be with her." i always felt i had to have things just right for him. He would claimt he house was a mess but when i looked around it looked pretty normal to me. his standards were out of this world. He started to criticize the way i dressed and even this was a huuuuuge shocker to me... he told me to loose weight! i am not a skinny person but im sure as hell not fat. im a size 10 and he said he likes size sixes. OMG! he told me he would walk around the block with me! one night i suspected he was not at work because he never txt me (he works a 3rd shift job). I made up a lie and told him i drove out to his job and his car wasnt there he said "my friend was borrowed my car for the night" so that was that! I called the police and had him removed from my home. He told me that i was being completely irrational and everything was made up in my head, he even said a prayer for me. I told him that I was catering to him too much and i needed to focus on myself. he agreed and we decided to try and make it work without living with each other. i have just now found out that he has been sleeping with yet another girl (which is the ex best friend of his last gf). He has to have constant attention.. for example , his status on facebook says " i need a gf" and within 2 mins it is flooded with his "fans." I blocked his number from my phone as well as restricted calls. he has contacted me at work and threatened me that he will take away everything that i love and i asked him why he would do that if he loved me and he said "because who are you going to run to when everything you love is gone?"....SURE AS HELL NOT U!!! his mind is so screwed up! i always thought that he couldnt show much emotion because thats how most men are. but he is actually really cold hearted. Going back to the very beginning... i spoke one on one with the mistress chick after they had broken up... she said that 3 months after she completely cut off all contact without notice that her house was broken into and destroyed except for her childrens things. i even saw the pics. he told me that it was his wife that did it. he is a liar...so who knows. the first time we broke up he threatened me and my childs life. everything has been documented in police records. he has always said how spoiled he is and he doesnt take no for an answer. today he told he that i am the "choosen one" whatever the f*** that means! and that he will not leave me alone. he said he will be at my house everyday to make my life a living hell. a part of me doesnt believe him buuuut before he got married he was in prison for 5 years for accessory to murder!!! which i didnt find out till later either. when i asked if he had any remorse... he said no. so i know what he is capable of, all i have to do is google his name and i am reminded. i want nothing to do with him anymore!!! i am done!!! This has been toxic and if anyone reading this has a spouse that even sounds remotely similar to run like a bat out of hell!!! any advice for me??

My story sounds a lot like yours, I am in so much pain right now though I can not beging to write what he put me through. It was five days ago when I decided enough was enough, but I broke the no contact and he called me yesterday only to inflict on me the worse pain imaginable. I need support to get through this and have no friends because he ran them all off.
Laurie