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The goal of this website is to give support to people who are facing problems in their relationship related to cheating, abuse and narcissism. I am living in Europe and English is not my native language, I wish you will excuse me if I make some grammatical errors. I have a background in neuroscience and behavioral sciences and I am currently doing brain research related to these topics in university in my home country. I decided to write in English because I wish to reach as many people as I can around the world. If you wish to read more about me, please visit page Site Overview.

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Today I have been reflecting back and thinking about my relationship with my former narcissistic partner. One of my friends asked me recently do I regret starting a relationship with my narcissistic spouse. I thought about this for a moment and said no, I do not regret. Yes, I did suffer with him. But also I learned a lot, about myself and life in general. I learned that there are different kinds of people on this earth, some of them more empathetic than the others. My narcissistic spouse belonged to the latter category. Does that make him a bad person? I do not think so. He was simply a different kind of a person than I was. The question was, could I share my life with someone like him. The answer was simple, in a long run "no". I would have been miserable for the rest of my life if I stayed with him.

I no longer have feelings of hatred towards my narcissistic partner. I have forgiven him what he did to me. I realize now that only after being able to forgive him, I was able to let go of the relationship. I was able to let go of the bad memories, his mental abuse and coldness, all that was suddenly in the past and the Future was in front of me, exciting, unpredictable future! I might meet someone I could love as strongly as I loved him, or I might not find such a person. There is always that risk.

I realized that it was the FEAR that had kept me together with him for such a long time. Fear of never finding someone who I could love as much as I loved him. But when I realized that even if I stayed together with him, the feeling I had towards him in the beginning of the relationship would never return. Too much had happened. He had done too many bad things, those things had corrupted my feeling towards him. Nothing could be done to undone those things. I was attached to a mere shadow of my initial love towards him. When I realized I could never get back that feeling I had towards him in the beginning of the relationship, it was easier for me to let go of the relationship. 

I wish my experiences will help You to break free from a relationship that is making you unhappy. I will get back tomorrow to tell you more details about my relationship and with another Positive Thought of the Day! Until then take care Dear Friends!

- Maria  

If you wish to familiarize yourself with my blog and to read older posts, click this link to go to the Blog Main Page

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