I would like to see if you are credible in what you say. You seem to be talking a lot about cognitive therapy and using Albert Ellis's type of ideas, but I do not see anywhere where you cite your sources or give anyone else credit. You had to have learned this from somewhere. Where is your evidence? I mean it is good, and I agree with you, but that is because I agree with Albert Ellis founder of Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy. This stuff has been around for years, yet you don't cite anyone else work but your own. What is your last name? What are your credentials? Are you a licenses therapist? Do you have a degree in phycology, social work, mental health and counseling? How come you don't have your full name on your website, your credentials and your educational background?
The goal of this website is to give support to people who are facing problems in their relationship related to cheating, abuse and narcissism. I am living in Europe and English is not my native language, I wish you will excuse me if I make somegrammatical errors. I decided to write in English because I wish to reach as many people as I can around the world.
Thank you for your comment, I am very glad that you posted it. It is very important that these points are clearly addressed on the site so that no one gets a feeling they are being mislead in any way. I thought I was clear about these matters already before, but your comment made me realize I have to be even more specific.
First of all let me answer to your last question; I wish to remain anonymous for same reasons as others who visit this website and post comments and share stories; the things I discuss here (related to my own relationship) are very personal and I wish to keep my privacy instead of letting the whole world know my name. This is a peer-to-peer support website, so when I post my replies to people's stories I am giving my personal opinion regarding their situation, it is not intended to be an actual medical advice.
I have tried to be very clear about this in my replies and also elsewhere on the site, but your comment shows that it is not self-evident to some visitors, so I need to clarify this even more. I have now done so in section "About Maria": I have revealed a bit more about myself and my background and also emphasized even more strongly that this is a peer-to-peer support website and should be taken as such. it is very important that visitors understand that I am not offering actual medical advise and that this site is not a replacement for seeing a therapist (I am M.Sci in the field of neuroscience, I am not claiming anywhere on the site that I am a therapist or MD).
I have also added a chapter to page "About Maria" explaining why I am not using references in articles (I also added a small explanation about this topic to my ebook page). The lack of references does not mean that I am taking credit for all that I have written here for myself (it honestly did not even come to my mind that someone might think that I have invented all the things that are discussed on the site), instead what I write is based on the knowledge I have gathered from several sources during my adult life; I am writing based on that knowledge and also based on my personal experiences.
I have felt that because this is a peer-to-peer support site and does not portray itself as a professional medical site it is not necessary to include references into each article (if I did that, the feeling of the articles would change and they would become quite heavy for reader, as anyone who has read a scientific publication knows). Most websites are not using references, and so I have felt that because I am not claiming to be a professional therapist but rather someone offering peer-to-peer support forum for people who are going through what I have gone through, it is alright not to include references to these articles that are written in similar style as general forum posts. I am very sorry if this has offended some visitors.
I really wish that the majority of the visitors will understand why I do not wish to reveal my full name and understand that the reason for this "secrecy" is not because I have something to hide but rather the very same reason why most people choose to use a nickname when they write about their personal things online. If my anonymity offends someone, I sincerely apologize for it. I wish that this site as a whole shows that my intention is to help people who are going through hard time instead of just making personal profit. The download fees for my ebook are helping me to keep this site going, as it has grown to be very large and it takes lot of time to moderate it and also answer people privately and publicly. I am very grateful for all those visitors who choose to download the book, as they are helping me in a very concrete way to keep this site going and improve it further so that it could help people in need also in the future.
Dear Friend, I am very grateful for you for sending your message, I believe that the changes I have made based on your comments have really improved the site so that it can better serve its function as a support forum for people who seek help. Thank you again!
Dear Visitor, please read this short announcement!
As I look back now, I can clearly see how much my experiences with my ex partner changed me. Before I got involved with him I was more "self-centered"; I was concentrated mostly on my own life and was not putting lots of effort into helping others, as I am doing now. After all the heart-aches I went through, my priorities have changed fundamentally and I now feel genuine joy whenever I am able to help others, one way or another. My focus has shifted away from myself and into those around me, both people and animals, as well as nature as a whole. Consequently, instead of feeling bitter because of my former relationship, I am very glad that I met my ex and went through all that I did with him, because as a result of it this website was created and it is now able to help so many people who are dealing with similar painful issues. Something good came out or all the bad things that I experienced, and of that I am very happy and grateful.
I have recently started to work on a new website that is aiming to help animals of our planet; I am a huge animal lover and I wish to do my part in helping decrease their needless suffering. I hope people will find this new site and start sharing it with their friends. If you are interested in taking a look at it that would be fantastic (the web address is humaneuniverse.org) and if you like the site please feel free to share it with people you know. You are also warmly welcome to "like" Humane Universe page on Facebook. Thank you so much for your support!
If you wish to submit your own story and get feedback and support for your situation or if you wish to contact me for any other reason, send me email to